Some days are good. Children and hair both behave; adults conduct themselves in a manner commensurate with their age.
Other days, not so good. Grown, well-groomed women find themselves with the coordination of a 2-year-old in a growth spurt.
I have had days like that. Those days usuallly involve articles of white clothing. A perfect white tee, for example.
Said perfect white tee may dodge splattered orange juice, dribbled blue toothpaste, gray smudge from a grungy vehicle. One may arrive at work mightily pleased with oneself and one's well-fitting white tee.
But then there is coffee. Wear a fine white tee (like Gap's Essential T, pictured). Get a full mug of strong coffee. Commence drinking. And spill.
There is nothing — nothing, I say — like a half mug of hazelnut-flavored coffee poured all over one's chest. And mind you, this never happens to flat-chested women. No, only an ample bosom catches this.
And remember: Even if it is not hot coffee, it is still wet coffee. On a T-shirt.
No woman wants to take part in a wet-T-shirt contest at work, even if she is the sole contestant and sure winner.
It was the recollection of coffee-drenched tees and other sartorial calamities that fueled a recent conversation on spot removers. You know, there is always someone at work who has those and other lifesavers. Sewing kit, safety pins, clear nail polish, something for that-time-of-the-month, maybe even anti-static-cling spray ... and spot remover. Some hold by Shout wipes; others vouch for Tide-to-Go pens.
I've used them both. The wipes leave much to be desired when dealing with the fallout of a half mug of Peet's. I've had good results with the pen, but even that would have its work cut out for it in the wake of the coffee spill.
The spill of which I write was a particularly bad one. There was no simple fix. Sure couldn't take off the shirt and rinse it (although some might have welcomed that show). Couldn't just leave it, either — the whole front of the shirt had gone from white to brown, and reeked of Major Dickason's Blend and flavored Coffee-mate. I had no choice: I scurried up the street to a Limited shop (thank goodness for working downtown!), found the cheapest white tee they had, paid and scurried back to work. Ducked in the ladies' room for a swift change, and voila! presentable once again.
And hence my epiphany: To the emergency stash, add one dressy white tee. Needn't be expensive.
But keep it in a zipped bag. Wouldn't want to spill coffee on it before its time.
